“At last: some good news for all of us itching to get away after a year stuck at home.”
A special report
By Avril LaPremière, Chief Staff Writer
London’s Heathrow Airport issued a surprise announcement today with the unveiling of a brand new travel corridor, which will allow lockdown-weary travellers to experience a taste of countries such as Spain, Greece and Italy. This comes ahead of the British government’s eagerly awaited announcements scheduled for Monday 5th and Monday 12th April, and will be music to the ears of those desperate for some exotic flavours to look forward to this spring and summer.
The corridor leads from the mothballed passport zone in Terminal 6 – dormant since the outbreak of the pandemic a year ago – into the southeast spur, and is known as the Overseas International Corridor, or OIC for short. At over 8 metres (25 feet) wide, the OIC will comfortably allow travel in both directions without risk of breaking the 2-metre rule. And at nearly 1.6km (1 mile) in length, travellers are guaranteed a proper journey, reminiscent of the endless indoor traipses of real air travel.
Clearly marked exits at intervals along the corridor will guide passengers into zones labelledSpain, Greece, Italy, France, Cyprus, Croatiaand Portugal. Here, virtual travellers will be able to browse and buy a wide range of that country’s specialities, from Greek olives and feta to Spanish chorizo or churros, all served by appropriately dressed staff speaking only in their mother tongue. Brits will no doubt flock to la zone française to snaffle cut-price appellations incontrôlées and freshly caught poissons d’avril. For those who wish to stock up in large quantities, luggage trolleys are provided, while a bubble wrap service is available for delicate items.
“The aim was to give Brits who are fed up with domestic life a little adventure into another world”, explains CEO Joe King. “With so much of our airport real estate lying unused, it made total sense – both economically and emotionally – to bring those silent corridors back to the life they deserve”. Questioned about the legality of the venture, he explained: “By offering food items for sale. the journey qualifies as essential shopping. And with the partial relaxation last Monday of the Stay-At-Home rule, we expect our new travel corridor to prove extremely popular.”
Tickets are available on the OIC website, or by calling Sales Co-ordinator Hugh Felfret on 0117 946 7072 (from 9am-12 noon, today only).